"You 'BECOME' the horse said to the rabbit. 'It doesn't happen all at once. It takes a very long time. Generally by the time you are REAL most of your hair has been loved off and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But those things don't matter, because you are real, you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.' " >>> The Velvateen Rabbit
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Friday, March 14, 2008
I love "Bare" jokes!
Gotcha! But I really do love bear jokes. These are my favorites. Another favorite is the campers in a tent, and a bear is reaching under the edge feeling around with his paw, and the Lady says,"George, cut that out." Well there is my humor for this Friday foggy day.
Thought for the day: Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says "Dam!"
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Disclaimer: If you need to remove this post I do understand. The joke I'm posting has no bad language but is a dirty joke.
(It's the only bear joke I know)
A hunter spots a grizzly bear 1,000 yards away, but he can't get any closer so he aims his rifle and pulls the trigger. He can see he's hit the bear, so he sets off after it. When he finally catches up to the bear, the bear is clutching his shoulder and says, "Was it you who shot me?"
The hunter says, "Yes."
The bear says, "You need to be taught a lesson." The bear strips off the hunter's clothes, bends him over, and has his way with him.
Several minutes later the hunter struggles to his feet, pulls himself together, and vows to find that bear. He searches through the woods, up hill and dale, and then he spots it 500 yards away, aims his rifle, pulls the trigger, and sets off after it. When he catches up to the bear, the bear says, "Did you shoot me again?"
The hunter, trembling, says, "Yes."
The bear says, "Well, maybe this'll teach you," whereupon it grabs up the hunter, rips off his already tattered clothing, throws him violently to the ground, and really rips him a new one.
The hunter eventually gets to his feet, naked and dazed, and he decides he's going after the bear one more time. He trips through dense underbrush, he trudges through soupy swamps, and he treks across vast valleys, and finally he finds the bear only a hundred yards away, across a small opening. He takes careful aim, holds his breath, and pulls the trigger.
The hunter, already exhausted, sprints up to the bear.
The bear says, "Did you shoot me AGAIN?"
The hunter says, "Yep."
So the bear says, "You didn't really come here to hunt, did you?"
(I would have e-mailed it to you but I saw no e-mail link on your blog)
Johnny that is hysterical! I will leave it here for any one else to read. Thanks for the smile this mornig!!
Phew!! That just stinks! The Wireless that left a message is a spam to advertize!! How dare they!!
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