This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

I think I mentioned that I had to sign up with a different staffing agency, since the state's right hand didn't know that the left hand wasn't using the one that they had me sign up with a couple mo. ago. So here it is now almost Aug. The suspense is that when I did the lengthy paper work for this new agency (which is 250 miles away BTW) I had to do a 15 question nursing test. Can you believe I missed one too many questions to pass. They had about half of the questions about IV drip rates and calculating drug doses in mg. per kg. Haven't done any of that stuff for so many years! And any books I have left were of minimal help. Well they e-mailed me a second test and I was very careful to double check every question and only had 2 that I wasn't positive about. So today I will get the results, then I am headed to my niece's house on Sun to have a short visit as she is about 50 miles from the agency. And on Mon. will do my 2 hrs orientation with them, and do another drug screen test. Boy you would think I was applying for some high security job. Oh, I guess it sort of is. LOL

I'm not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.

We still sleep light at night because we are listening for Molly. Like when you have a baby in the house you hear their sounds. She frequently had to go out in the middle of the night. So now we still listen for her. Had pizza out yesterday and "almost" brought home a piece of crust for her. She always expected some little tidbit when we ate out.

We have all her "bunnies" and dog beds washed and gathered up any left over dog food, biscuits, leashes, collars, and brushes. Found a animal shelter down by where we go fish so plan to take the stuff down there the first of the week.

So we are on the mend and can talk and laugh about her now and not get to teary eyed. She won't be forgotten, that's for sure. We also just realized that we have no guard dog now.

Thought for the day: Life truly is short and we need to enjoy and appreciate what we have.

Who will remind me to go fetch the mail?

We had to put our faithful dog Molly to sleep yesterday. She lived with some health issues and in the last year had been loosing so much muscle in her hips and hind legs. She had developed "fatty" tumors in numerous sites, the worse being on her chest, and flank. On Sunday she tried to chase a cat that was sitting on the back fence and she pulled or tore something in one hind leg. As a result she was trying to walk on 3 legs, and with one of them weak she just couldn't manage. We had to use a towel to help her walk and she would just lay and look at us with those intelligent eyes, like she was asking use to help her.

It is so sad when the mind is still so sharp and smart but the rear end fails. So at nearly 13 we just had to do what was right and let her go. We soothed her while the vet did the injection and it was over so quick and she is at peace now and no more pain. I know she has suffered for some time and we had agreed along time ago we would not let her suffer when the time came.

She was the best dog ever, even if others may not have seen it, as she was not very friendly to others, but that was our fault and not hers. She was so smart that we had taken to spelling things and sometimes she figured that out too. She would mind us so well, we could let her out anywhere with no leash and she would obey us with verbal and hand signs to stay where we would tell her.

What I will miss most was her total devotion to us. Her vocal Woooo Woooo greeting when we would come in the door. She trusted us and loved us unconditionally, and you can't ask any more than that from your dog. I have only seen my husband cry twice, once when he was in acute pain with a kidney stone and yesterday after we came home to an empty house.

We have agreed that there will be no more dogs, at our age, we don't want to be tied down with that responsibility again. We have had 2 good dogs, I was counting up and we have had a dog in our lives for a total of 24 of the 27 years we have been together. Thats alot.

Glory Be

Can't believe I am finally getting the 1 day training I needed at the prison before I could start nursing orientation. It is a sort of crash course in how be behave in a prison ect. Since I won't be an actual state employee I have to have this. I will be working thru a staffing agency.

Which is another long story. I talked to the D.O.N. earlier in the week and sort of reminded her that I put my application in the end of March, I signed on with a staffing agency that she suggested, which made me purchace liability ins. and get a drug screening at my expense. And she keeps stringing me along with this training thing that had to be scheduled. Anyway she told me this week that the state wasn't using that agency now and I would have to apply thru an agency across the state in the big city. So now I got my packet, have to get a physical (Mon) and get this all sent back, then go to a city in NE part of state on Aug, 3 to do orientation with them. Then >>>>>>> I will be ready to actually work and earn some money!!

Makes your head swim but at least I am swimming upstream.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

OK the rest of the story on our housing development. Rick who is the sales person has told us that they won't be able to start up our home owners association till a certain % of the homes are built. Guess we aren't there yet, In the mean time folks are supposed to pay their dues to the head office. This company has housing developments in several cities around here, 3 in our city. So the money goes in their pot. We can't govern ourselves. Also since they aren't building more homes there are alot of lots growing up in weeds. Alot of home owners are angry as it makes the complex look bad. The only thing they maintain is a strip of lawn as you come into our area on one end and the weeds in a rock area that has some shrubs there. After alot of phone calls from folks, last mo. they came in and sort of mowed the weeds in the vacant lots but not very short due to all the large rocks.

Many of us think we will hold out when dues are to be paid this coming year. Wonder how that will fly?

When you get Mad should you get Even?

Our builder/Realtor took us for a little ride recently, and I am still steaming.
We closed on our home on Dec 30. Last week we got a delinquent notice for 2008 property taxes. Seems the first notice went to the builder. Somewhere along the line, they paid the 07 taxes of less than 60$(was on our closing) as the property was bare dirt then. No where did it mention who owed the 08 taxes. Seems that WE owe that. We went to the court house and to the title co. and that is just the way it is. When we went to our developer thru the supervisor at our home development they said that "he" should have taken better care of his contract.
Now this company has this Christian mission statement in their literature.

Well I composed this letter quoting some of their mission statements and laying out what had happened, and that it was a shabby way to do business and treat their home owners. We owned the home for 2 days! I am sending a copy to the Better Business Bureau, and the State Realtor Commission.

I know it won't do any good but just want to raise a little stink. Maybe get even just a little.
I think they are going out of business anyway, not building any more houses and laying most of their people off. Not sure where that will leave us here in this development with only half the lots built on. But thats another story.

Many are saved from sin by being so inept at it.

I love the title here. Was one of my little thingys at the sidebar here.
I have started with the volunteers at the library here in our fair city. I think I will love it. Did my first orientation yesterday. It was a big deal to learn how the carts are set up with books that need returned to the shelves. They are grouped on carts by category, then the shelver (that's me) has to put them in order and there is more to it than you would think, so that when you take the cart out you can go down the line and put them where they belong.

Hope in my next lifetime I am a reader. I just know I can't get around to reading all the books I want to in this life.

Stuff

What does "home is where the heart is" mean? What does "home" mean to you?
It seems that we have moved so many times that each time I sort of get a diluted feeling about my home. I find it harder to get very attached to it. Maybe because I feel it won't be the last one. Maybe part is the moving so often, maybe part is getting older and realizing that material stuff is just stuff.

I loved the old routine that George Carlin did years ago about "our stuff" Wish I could remember more of it, but the gist was that we all work hard to have our stuff, then need a place to put our stuff, but you can't take your stuff with you. I guess I feel like our home is just more stuff. And sometimes all the stuff just gets to feeling like a burden. Maybe that's why we need garage sales every so often so we can sell our stuff to someone else who is still looking for their stuff.

When we watch the news, and who doesn't feel alarmed now days, we say things like we need to just find a cabin in the mountains and go there, with no TV, Phones, or Computers. Well maybe we should. But we won't, cause we still think we need all our "stuff"

Food for thought

I Know

it's hard to be reconciled

not everything is exactlly

the way it ought to be

but please turn around and step into the future

leave memories behind

enter the land of hope

--Zbigneiw Herbert, from A Life

Wikopedia's defination

Synchronicity is the experience of two or more events which are causally unrelated occurring together in a meaningful manner. In order to count as synchronicity, the events should be unlikely to occur together by chance.

When I looked up the word I found a site that uses this subject as a basis for a religion. Found that interesting.

I think my strangest synchronicity event was hearing a word that I had never heard before and the next day I saw that word on a license plate. Can't remember what it was, but I see small things frequently that to me a little whisper in my ear to help me be more aware.

Please let me grow old with joy

It is so hard to have a family member who is so negative, suspicious, righteous, pushy, opinionated, and well I guess thats enough.
I am talking about my nearly 85 year old SIL. Now I have known her for nearly 30 years and I don't see this as a new thing with her, just a worsening of her attitudes. On one hand she is the most generous person I know, then on the other hand so miserly that I have to just laugh so I don't get upset. She will gladly give something of value to someone if she thinks they will "take care" of it. But will hang onto silly things like say a bundle of old paint brushes, just in case she needs one, or a whole box of plastic cloths hangers, in case one breaks. This little stuff I can deal with, but its the other things that are hard to live with. She has taken a dislike to a neighbor that is katty corner across from her. They actually have a beautiful lawn, but keep kids bikes in the driveway and a mower, and trash cans along side of the house that is not noticeable unless you drive down the street. But every time we drive her home she cranes her neck to look and complain about what a trashy place it is and how she may have to call and report them. Oh, she loves to have a cause to be calling about. The house next door to her was repossessed, so is sitting empty, being a new home, the folks had not put a lawn in yet, so the weeds were growing. It became her mission to track down who (which bank) owned the house so she could get someone to take care of the weeds. She harassed the subdivision manager long enough that he went over and mowed them himself. But its just everything, someones dog, kid, weeds, wasps, wind, you name it. Its like she can't see any joy in anything.
So I have vented my frustration and maybe its just time I went to work so I don't have so much time on my hands and I won't end up being a negative person too.

I want to find joy everyday, even if I am the only one who sees it and no one else does. I would like to do Oprah's little thing of writing a little thankful note everyday, just for myself.

For today I am thankful for the little humming bird that is faithful to our feeder and the pleasure I get watching him sit on a tree limb near the feeder like he is the owner of it. Also for the smiles from the old Veterans I saw today riding the float in the July 4 parade and for the beautiful clouds with the sun shining thru as the sun was going down tonite.

Why do we hate Garage Sales?

Just finished a 2 day garage sale with my SIL. She did good to sell a couple easy chairs, and a big cedar chest, plus alot of small stuff. We sold alot of old 8 tracks, coffee cans full of matches from the 70's, and one large mirror, and some small stuff. The rest is boxed up to go to the Salvation Army. Just glad to be done with it.

Headed out tomorrow to the "city" to Sam's and a health food store. Then on Tue. we are going fishing!! I got worms in the refrig. to prove that we really are. Man, 4$ for a little tub of worms, I assume there are a doz. in the tub. They better do their stuff and catch us a few trout.

God whispered in my ear, again

I picked up a book yesterday and started the first few lines, and as I read the words "big deal" at the same moment those words were said on TV, "big deal". Not a coincidence, just more synchronicity. Would love to hear if you are finding these in your life.

Me and ABBA

With ABBA in my ears I did a 2 mile "quick" walk last pm. Getting better. I have a road that runs a couple blocks behind our house that is a straight 1 mile stretch. Not to much traffic and lots to see. Most of the homes are build on 1/4 to 1 acre lots. So they have horses and just such a diverse setting. Makes the walk easier. ABBA helps as most of the music is very fast beat. A couple days ago I went to the river trail. Which is nice, but just a little scary alone. It is a great bike trail but meanders thru trees and secluded. Think I will try the other end of it that is out in the open and maybe more used.

Talked to the Director of Nursing that is managing the facility where I am trying to get on. Looks like I will be doing some orientation soon, and will fill in some shifts thru the nursing agency that I have applied with. This will be good till the state finally has an "official" position posted for me.

We are trying to get everything ready to do a combined garage sale with SIL. Have all our stuff priced and ready but now weather looks like rain Fri. and Sat. So guess we will wait a week. Just want to get it over with. We LOVE doing garage sales, about like having your fingernails pulled out.

Do as I say, not as I do

I was cleaning out my desk and found this joke I had cut out. It is a picture of a Dr. sitting behind a desk, He is very obese and he is asking his patient: "Are you eating properly and getting plenty of exercise?"

Made me think that alot of times we are ready to hand out advice that maybe we don't really follow ourselves. Food :) for thought.

All quiet on the western front. (I just made that up)

Heading out bright and early in the AM to take that test I mentioned before. Hubby going with me. He overdid yesterday, (only 1 wk. since he broke the 2 ribs) He is having alot of shoulder pain. But each day I can tell it is better. I told him he is getting grouchy and sassy so that is a good sign. But he is so stubborn!!

Still having a bit of cool weather for it being almost the first of summer. We will be wishing for these breezes and fluffy clouds next month.

Not much else new so bye for now.

Here's to the importance of fiber in your diet!

Hubby still not doing so well with the rib pain. But did a lung check today and he is moving air down in the bottom and it sounds clear. Just have to be patient. Yesterdays bathroom drama about wiped him out. Definitely no joking matter. Have been adding extra calcium, IBU's, and FIBER. I know it will get better every day. Dang we are all ready to go fishing.

Having a cool spring (or is it summer?) May save alot on air conditioning if we can just quit running the heat in the mornings. Still down in the 50's at nite. Can't really complain.

Will be heading to Canon City next week to take a competency test, (just to be sure I haven't lost my nursing smarts) A 4 hr drive one way to take a 1 hr test. Hopefully hubby can go with me and we can check out the lakes on the way home.

Little brother headed to NC to see his oldest grand daughter graduate Sat. Have a safe trip.

That's it for now.

Hubby's Boo Boo

Yesterday hubby was sealing a little crack in the bed of the pickup, (we are getting a camper shell put on it this week) and he was getting down by "hopping" off the tailgait. Guess his hand slipped and he banged his back on the corner of the lowered tailgait. He came into the house, looking real pastey and groaning, trying to breath. He has a good abrasian up the left side of his back. He refused to go to ER at the time. But by nite time I told him we were definately going this morning just to make sure there were no internal injuries. The X-ray shows one complete break and another one almost all the way thru. So he is sleeping in the recliner as he can't lay down, taking IBU, and ice. Got to go pester him soon to do some deep breathing. I will try to scan the printout of the X-ray and add it here. Its all digital now and they sent us home a copy.

I am soooo tired.

Wow, that trip to Mo. and all really kicked my butt. Haven't had much energy to do much since I got home last Tue. Recap: I was gone 18 days. 2 day drive both ways, I kept the store open for 12 days straight to sell out as much stock as possible, Sold the book cases, pictures, card rack, advertising sign, and a couple small tables. Then I took my main desk and a couple of bookcases to my daughter. The remaining books, turned out to be about 1900, I donated to a local little library, and what a job to get them boxed up and loaded in her truck.

The store is all clean, and winterized all ready thanks to help from brother and his girl friend. I really couldn't have been more pleased with how it went. Of course when it was all empty and just me looking at the empty shelves I wanted to cry. I really didn't want to give up my store, but I know something else is waiting for me to do. It was a wonderful experience and maybe someday I will do something like that again. Not sure what I will do with the building, I left a sign on the front that anyone wishing to inquire about the building to call my brother.

The 2 days to drive home were peaceful. But as I said I have had a bad case of dragging butt.

Oh, we did get our fishing license this week and found an old camper shell to put on the little pickup so we can throw our gear in and go fishing. Yea. Very soon.

My synchronicity

While driving home Tue I hit a rain storm, well ended up driving in and out of the rain all day. But just as I was going into the rain for the first time, a song came up on my CD I was listening to by the Mavericks called " can you guess? "Here comes the Rain"

I always feel like this is God's way of saying "I am here" "Did you notice that?"